fBy Successfully Doing This, You’ll be Ahead of the Game

Adrian Quintina
4 min readAug 1, 2022

No one likes rejection. A human fundamental need is acceptance and when we are rejected it has the sting of an angry scorpion. Rejection is not fun, but it doesn’t have to derail your efforts or your future. It is a part of life that everyone must face. While rejection isn’t enjoyable, it’s rarely fatal and if one handles it well and learns to dust themselves off and move on, they will be ahead of the game.

Here are a few strategies you can use to help you use rejection as a stepping-stone to success.

Try these tips to deal with rejection quickly and effectively, so you can move on:

1. Take a short break. Whether a potential romantic partner, your boss, or a well-respected publishing house rejected you, take a short period of time to grieve and pull yourself together. Avoid taking too long to reengage with your life, though. A ‘pity party’ should not take more 24 hours, but in some cases, you can gloat for up to 3 days, but like all parties it needs to come to an end so you can move on. The point is, take the time you need, but get back out there as quickly as possible.

2. Realize that many other opportunities exist. How many potential romantic partners exist in the world? Millions. You’ll have other ideas to pitch to your company or product. A single rejection only means that you’re participating in the world. The only people that don’t get rejected are at home on the couch and maybe the reason they are there is because they have not gotten over a rejection from their past.

* There are plenty of opportunities in your future. Many of them are far better than your recent miss. Learn from today as you look ahead, but don’t dwell in the past, which leads me to my next point…

3. Learn from the rejection. Was there something that you could have done better? Take the opportunity to really look at the rejection and learn from it. If you can learn one small thing from each negative experience in your life, you’ll have far fewer of them.

* If appropriate, ask what you can do to improve. A job interviewer might be very willing to give you a few pointers that you can apply in the future. Listen closely to the answers you receive.

4. Avoid automatically assuming that the reason for the rejection is related to you. For instance, there are hundreds of reasons why you didn’t get the job and it has nothing to do with you personally:

* Someone else was better qualified

* An internal candidate was selected

5. Remember that each rejection is bringing you closer to success. How can you fail if you avoid quitting? Keep at it and you’ll eventually find the success you’re seeking. Sales people are trained to believe that every “no” is another step closer to a “yes.”

6. Remember that everyone deals with rejection. The most successful people get rejected the most. They just do a better job of forging ahead than those with average results.

7. Monitor your self-talk. Keep your thoughts positive and upbeat. A poor mood and expectations give poor results. Say good things to yourself and good things will happen.

8. Treat yourself well. A failure isn’t an excuse to mistreat yourself. Overeating, over drinking alcohol, or excessive spending isn’t the answer. Celebrate the fact that you made an effort! Maybe your rejection even deserves a small reward.

Rejection is just an undesired outcome. Avoid allowing rejection to have a negative impact on your mood or behavior. As the song goes, ‘dust yourself off and try again’. Learn, grow, and try again (and again). If you are not deterred by rejection, learn from your mistakes, consistently show up and seek opportunities to grow, you are well ahead of the game and will experience success in your life.

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Adrian Quintina

Helping Women Stop Self Sabotaging to Glow Up and Thrive. Certified Coach, Speaker, Bestselling Author, Mompreneur, Traveling Enthusiast, @realfearlessher