6 Easy Tips To Let Go Of Your Hurtful Past And Liberate Yourself of Shame + Guilt

Adrian Quintina
3 min readNov 15, 2021

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You probably have a lot of good memories you cherish, but there are also things in the past that should stay in the past. If you find yourself unable to move forward, then you need to read this article to find out how you can free yourself from a painful past that keeps you trapped in shame and guilt.

Focus on the Now

“If you feel anxiety or depression, you are not in the present. You are either anxiously projecting the future or depressed and stuck in the past. The only thing you have any control over is the present moment; simple breathing exercises can make us calm and present instantly.” ― Tobe Hanson

There’s a reason why the past is called the “past.” It means there’s no going back. You can’t turn back the clock no matter how bad you want it. It’s just impossible. If you want to free yourself from the past, then you’ve got to put everything behind you and focus on what you have in your life right this very moment.

Make New Memories

“You shouldn’t wait for other people to make special things happen. You have to create your own memories.” — Heidi Klum

Sometimes the best way to go about replacing bad memories is by making new ones. Think of something that will truly be memorable for you, something that will make you smile many years from now.

Try Something New

“Life is about taking chances, trying new things, having fun, making mistakes and learning from it.” — Anonymous

Exploring new territories and new experiences will certainly help you focus on the ‘now.’ When you’re doing something new, and you’re still learning the ropes, you often have to be aware of what you’re doing so you don’t do something foolish (this is especially important if you’re doing something risky).

Learn to Forgive

“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” — Nelson Mandela

Forgiveness is often key to letting go of a hurtful past. Some may say ‘forgive and forget,’ but forgetting isn’t always helpful. Let your bad experience teach you. Remembering the bad things that happened in the past can help you avoid similar situations in the future.

Express Yourself

“You’ve got to express yourself in life…what you reveal, you heal.” — Chris Martin

Bottling up your negative emotions can be harmful. So, it’s best if you can express yourself in a manner that will help you ‘exorcise’ your demons. Write about it in a journal, write a song about it, paint your emotions, or whatever works for you! You’ll feel much better after.

Let It Go

“Accept yourself, love yourself, and keep moving forward. If you want to fly, you have to give up what weighs you down.” — Roy T. Bennett

Sometimes, there’s really no point in rehashing things that have happened a long time ago. You have to make a conscious decision to let go and finally put a stop to your self-pity or self-hate or whatever negative emotion your past brings out in you.

You have come a long way in life and you have many things that you can feel proud of. There have been a number of problems that you needed to overcome and you did that. So, reflect on the great things that you have done before, let go of the past and move confidentially into you amazing future.

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Adrian Quintina

Helping Women Stop Self Sabotaging to Glow Up and Thrive. Certified Coach, Speaker, Bestselling Author, Mompreneur, Traveling Enthusiast, @realfearlessher